Comparing Yourself to Others

Why am I not like…?

If only I were as brave and self-confident as…, than I would surely make it…

I’ll never be the same as…

S/he is luckier, and what about me?

Sooner or later, this type of thinking can lead to lower self-confidence. Don’t let the thought of being inferior or weaker than others appear in your head. This direction of thinking can become a reason for perceiving yourself as a person who has no impact on your own life … “It is as it is and nothing will change it” – this attitude can make us passive, dissatisfied with who we are and with the world around us.

This makes you feel inferior, or you perceive others as the reason of dissatisfaction with your own life. You may also see yourself as a frustrated person or blame those around you for your own failures. But remember that this is a passive attitude! You must avoid it because it will certainly not help you at all.

Comparing yourself to people who are better than you at something/ own something you don’t (and it doesn’t matter in what area) is pointless… Why? Everyone has their amazing POTENTIAL AND GIFT! You just have to try to see it.

 

The downsides of comparison

Remember that comparing yourself to others disturbs your inner peace and your emotions, breaks relationships with other people, and inhibits development. It can also lead to a predominance of negative feelings, a lack of self-acceptance, anger, sadness, uncertainty, and regret.

Jealousy can also accompany comparison. When it is filled with negative feelings, it will never help us or enrich our interpersonal relationships.

 

The advantages of comparison

It is worth mentioning that there is also a positive type of comparison. It inspires you to act and thus it is uplifting. It will give you hope and a positive sense of effectiveness. Another person’s success can motivate you very positively. However, you need to change your thinking pattern. And I’m not saying it’s easy!

 

 

What should you focus on to stop comparing yourself to others in a negative way?

1. Self-esteem – Accept yourself as you are, accept your looks. For example, I have lots of smart, beautiful friends, some of them are models, others are talented actresses. Although I know that with my height I have no chance to be a model or actress, I can tell each of them how much I value their talent, beauty, and knowledge. I don’t consider the lack of adequate height in terms of imperfection. That’s how I am – I accept myself.
2. Strengths – List all your strengths on a piece of paper, what you like best in yourself and what you can improve. The desire to work on yourself is also your strength.
3. Make use of your potential – Focus on what you do well and with pleasure.
4. Gratitude – don’t focus on what others have, appreciate what is good, what surrounds you: family, friends, health.
5. Get down to work – don’t be passive!

 

Choose your own way!

I don’t want to go too much into theory but there is one thing I must mention. Each of you has the potential and gift to be what you want! You only have to see it and believe in it. Then you need to build an action plan that suits you, choose your path. I chose my own. Some say that this is a fairly winding road to the goal and difficult to overcome. The most important thing, however, is that the choice is mine, I go this way and sometimes I have to deal with different consequences of this choice. I certainly avoid such emotions as jealousy. It helps a lot in life!

In the era of social media, the saying: “Be yourself, there is no other such person in the world. You are special” has become quite popular and it is the most adequate summary. No one will ever be you and you will never be someone else, because you are unique, so just love it and always love yourself.

Lots of love!