self-confidence

By depreciating our own worth, however, we build obstacles around ourselves, which sometimes prevent us from taking action. At times or, even permanently, we feel insecure and unsure of ourselves.

It’s worth working on this if you wish to be able to open new doors in your life without fear paralyzing your hands.

It has been proven that people who are more self-confident earn about 12% more doing the same thing as those that are less so. Remember that book smarts does not necessarily have to translate into confidence and doing well in everyday life.

How to build self-confidence?

POSTURE

Working on your posture is a good place to start with. Stand up straight, position legs at hip width, and feet parallel. Lift the arms slightly and pull the shoulder blades together, make the arms go slightly backwards, open the chest. Remain in this position. Feel the spine, how it’s straight now, how strong of a body’s axis it is. Pull your belly in, lift the chin slightly. Feel the energy that flows freely through your body. You have assumed the power position that has changed you both mentally and physically, because you have just increased your testosterone level (leader’s hormone), while having decreased the cortisol level.

Keep at it and strive to make it your body’s normal positon. If you succeed and it becomes a habit, you will feel stronger as a person, able to act and overcome obstacles.

Assume this position especially in critical situations, when the body instinctively hunches and closes up, because stress takes over.

SHOUT

Shout your heart out! I would always do it before entering the mat during a karate championship – it was a great confidence boost. Shout loudly and firmly before an important event, meeting, or a sports competition. You can do it at home, in the park – it can really bolster one’s courage and also relieves stress while at it.

CONTROL YOUR THOUGHTS

Take a piece of paper and write down your successes in the fields and spheres that will come to your mind (their number is up to you) e.g., passions, health, relationships with others, family, learning, sports, work, finances etc. Remember that success doesn’t necessarily have to be a big deal, a spectacular event. Sometimes they are just small, everyday achievements, but nonetheless just as important – remaining firm in one of your resolutions, overcoming fear, helping someone, or handling a difficult situation. Think about what has and continues to give you satisfaction, both small – a kind of satisfaction that is sometimes invisible or incomprehensible to others – and that of considerable degree. Note these victory down. Think what qualities and skills you owe them to, and write these down next to each of the achievements.

Example:

I passed my last finals with flying colors.

• I didn’t give up when studying was tough and didn’t go smoothly – I am strong.
• I kept the promise I made myself to attend all the lectures – I am persistent.<
• I came up with a studying plan – I know how to manage my time.<

I am intelligent, well-organized, strong, patient, and persistent.

Highlight your strengths in the color of your choosing. Read them aloud.

CONVERSATION

If you want to make a good impression during a conversation, try to navigate it towards topics you feel familiar with and have considerable knowledge about.

BE CAREFUL, THOUGH

A self-confidence that is based on false premises grows rapidly and turns into arrogance. A level-headed, centered and wise person is confident, but also equipped with a healthy dose of humility.

DON’T COMPARE YOURSELF TO OTHERS!

Comparing yourself with others will lead you astray every single time. We don’t know the path that others have had to go through, their own struggles, and their health. So let’s not judge away. Telling yourself that “I’m better than the others” leads to conceit. Whereas convincing yourself that “I’m worse than the others” is a simple way to lose what’s left of your self-confidence.

Let us build healthy confidence with our victories, patiently and calmly. And help others build it – praise one another, tell each other nice things, do more appreciating!

Let’s enjoy life!

Photos from a book „Zdrowe gotowanie” (Eng., Healthy Cooking) by Marta Wojtal